There is one more story in this journey that I think you will enjoy. Tim and I left New York this morning for the flight to San Francisco. Going through security I had taken my liquids and put them in the required plastic bag, computer out, shoes off, etc. When my small bag came through the agent asked me if she could look through it. She opened the bag reached in a pulled out my bottle of Barack Obama hot sauce. Our eyes met in a mixture of sadness and panic. She was clearly upset about the idea of the precious bottle meeting an ignoble end. I told her not to worry, but she should see if she could keep it by telling her boss that I gave it to her. She said she would lose her job if she did that. Tim suggested putting the bottle up on the x-ray machine with a sign citing it as an example of things you cannot bring onto the plane. We went over to put our shoes back on and she came running up and told me that they could put it through a special scan and if it was OK I could take it. It passed and she handed it to me and the security guards all cheered! It is sitting safely on the stove in Sonoma ready to spice up our lives now that the excitement is over...........
Thank you Ann! You spiced up my inaugural experience with your entertaining blog.......
ReplyDeleteWelcome home. xoxo Mary
Dear Ann, I just read your My Turn, Stop Me if You've Heard This One. When I tried to Google you, I found a river, a wine, someone born in the 1800's, and more. Google in the hands of someone with attention posititve (interested in everything)can be wonderful and frustrating. I'm glad it's still the same day I started looking for you. When I finally found you, I realized that I had read your writing in other magazines over the years. Liked the Obama hot sauce piece. Loved the My Turn. I read it and wanted to run out and buy a copy of First-Person America. Problem: I'm broke. Did you write this piece for me to make me feel better? It worked. When I sell my first book, The World's Most Creative (And Dangerous)Quote Book (find the prototype-beta copy at www.knowords.com), your book is on the top of my list of books to buy. What a brilliant idea for you to think of doing this;what fortitude to have read all those interviews and to then write the book. I would love to have read most of the interviews. I worked on my book for the 30 years I taught school in Richmond, Virginia and Edinburgh, Scotland. Seven of my writing dreams: having my humor in The New Yorker, a poem in The Nation (payment negotiable), a front page story in The New York Times, a Kindle series of live short stories written in real time,
ReplyDeletea Mad Magazine piece on the funny parts of the recession, my creativity book, and five My Turns in Newsweek. Dreams are recession proof. (I'd settle for one.) They get thousands of submissions each year; you should be proud. Think of all of those people who read My Turns each week. If Newsweek ever quits the My Turn section, I would stop buying the magazine. It would be like The New Yorker cutting out the cartoons. Having read the past few months of PW, maybe we need another Federal Writers' Project. "Words" are the ultimate green. We don't need a bailout of the English language. Republicans and Democrats both love words even though they use doublespeak to keep us from knowing what they're doing.
I've read many Writer's Digest magazines and lots of books on publishing over the years. Normal Procedure: Writer with book goes to an agent, agent takes the book to publishers, one buys it, it gets published with blurbs added after the book is sold. People, hopefully, buy your book. Your book is perfectly timed for the recession. So is mine. Thomas Friedman has said many times: "Not drill,baby drill, but invent, baby invent." America's creativity is our most important product. I want my book to be in all those garage-inventors' garages. Question: What do you think of my plan? Plan: (I already have 2 recommendations from famous writers to their agents about my book.) I get beta-blurbs from creative people in different fields to take to the agent along with the recommendations. (I just got a blurb from a noted heart surgeon last week.) I'm doing this because of the unusual nature of my book and because of today's economy. I only have 10 copies to send out for beta blurbs for the agent. If you go to www.knowords.com, you'll see the book I designed that opens as a door to turn into two separate books that can be read as individual books or as one book; it comes with left and right brain wristbands, a bookmark, and a small poster of the black and white second cover. The first copy of my book I sent to my hero, Ray Bradbury. I'm trying to get two writers, one doctor, a designer, an inventor, and a few other famous creative people. Ann, what do you think of my plan? Suggestions would be appreciated. N. Wylie Jones
nwyliejones@hotmail.com
p.s. A famous designer put my letter to him on his website to help me; I didn't even ask.
When I see your book in stores, I'll spread copies with the covers out to get you maximum eye contact for buyers. I can't wait to read First-Person America.
p.p.s. "Economics is the only field in which two people can share a Nobel Prise for saying opposite things." Robert Alazar
"The juvenile sea squirt wanders through the ocean searching for a suitable rock or hunk of coral to cling to and make its home for life. When it finds its spot and takes root, it doesn't need its brain anymore, so it eats it. It's rather like getting tenure." Michael Scriven
"The easiest job in the world is fact checker for Fox News." N. Wylie Jones
"An onion can make people cry, but there's never been a vegetable that can make people laugh." Will Rogers
"Chris van Allsburg illustrates the mysteries, shadows the truth, and colors a child's soft look at the magic of the world."
N. Wylie Jones
"I think the reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself."
Rita Mae Brown
"Dwn wth vwls."
Ruth Ollins
"Too caustic? To hell with the cost; we'll make the movie anyway." Samuel Goldwyn
"Not knowing literary allusions was his Achilles' heel." N. Wylie Jones
"Puccini--silver macaroni, exquisitely tangled." H. L. Mencken
"The uncreative think garages are only for cars." N. Wylie Jones
"Women fake orgasms. But men can fake a whole relationship." Sharon Stone
"Women never have young minds. They are born three thousand years old."
Shelagh Delaney
"Lexicography is all about define intervention." N. Wylie Jones
"Politics is show business for ugly people." Paul Begala
"Never judge a book by its movie."
J. W. Eagon (Ann, your book would be a great movie. You can dream too.)